"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy. "

29 January 2011

3 in the Freezer

We went to the clinic yesterday to check on our 6 embryos and decide whether or not to transfer this month or freeze all due to my higher progesterone number on day of trigger. The night before, B and I had made our decisions based on scenarios of how many we have left. 6 was easy - transfer 2, freeze 4. 4 was easy - freeze all. But 5 was a little less so... transfer none? 1? or 2?

B actually wasn't there yet because his work schedule is such that he can't just leave work at any given time. He's a teacher and finding a sub for just an hour or two of his classes is difficult at his school. He said if we did transfer, he wouldn't be able to be there until just at the time of transfer. They had ME arrive an hour before.

So I went into the prep room with the hospital bed, gown and warm blanket and waited to talk with my RE before I got undressed. She came in with a big smile: 5! and 4 of which were grade A ( yes, they grade them like beef). But then we sat there together in the room trying to think of the best plan.

You see, nothing is really clear cut in this infertility world. Even last night as I looked up studies on pubmed there's conflicting information about serum progesterone levels on day of trigger. Some studies say it predicts lower pregnancy rates and therefore the best course of action is to freeze all and do an FET, others, not so much. But what really helped me to make my decision was not the numbers, but the visual look of my uterine lining.

A little science lesson: Before ovulation and before the uterus is exposed to progesterone, the uterine lining should look something like this (not mine, just a good pic on the in internet):


You can see there, what they call the 'triple stripe. Its the part where the thin white line is surrounded by some darker grey area and the a different white outline of the uterine lining. That's the area that gets shed every month when a woman gets her period. This is what we want the uterus to look like on the day of ovulation (or retrieval in and IVF cycle).

Once the uterus has been exposed to higher levels of progesterone, which in a natural cycle occurs right after ovulation and in an IVF cycle occurs on the day of retrieval when we start progesterone supplements, the lining starts to look more homogeneous, ie, no distinct triple stripe pattern.

My RE said that even though my progesterone numbers were a higher than they would like, she checked the pattern of my lining on the day of retrieval and it still looked 'triple striped.'

As she and I sat in the prep room yesterday trying to make our decision, I went back to these following facts: My body still "looked" receptive and on IVF #1,  I did actually get pregnant, albeit a chemical pregnancy, even though my progesterone was high then too.  As I said in my last post, science is fantastic for helping us make a good decision, but sometimes you just have to throw your hands up and roll the dice.  And with that, we made the decision to freeze the 3 best looking embryos and transfer the remaining 2.  It just felt like the right thing to do.

So here I am, saying hello to the 'two week wait' again.

Now, how do I get through these next few weeks with some sanity???

16 comments:

  1. Well, I am excited you got to freeze some and that they looked good. It's nice to know you have a back-up plan, but I hope you won't need it.

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  2. I hope the two weeks fly by and at the end...there is a BFP :)

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  3. sounds like a good choice. wishing you luck in the 2ww, I wish I had better advice on how to get through it but I have found there is really no easy way. hang in there.

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  4. Congrats on your transfer! I think you made the right decision!

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  5. I don't know how to get thru the tww but somehow we do it month after month. Good luck and hang in there.

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  6. Wow! Such big decisions! That must have been tough, but it sounds like a very well-thought out and reasonable plan. And your numbers....just fabulous!!! I am so so thrilled for you! I know the 2ww is going to be so tough. I know this is virtually impossible to do, but try your best not to read into every little symptom. I had myself COMPLETELY convinced this past cycle didn't work (after all, I thought I surely knew my body after all these IVF cycles), but I was dead wrong. Apparently each time can be very different. Hang in there, girl! Sending you tons of positive thoughts!!!!

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  7. Man this is like the BIG 2WW. I'm hoping for you!

    -Elphaba

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  8. A 2WW without losing your sanity? Impossible! You can try, the best of them have, but can you really avoid it? I hope you have a BFP at the end to make it all worth it.

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  9. Those are always such difficult decisions to make. We just have to trust our gut and know that we made the right decision in that moment.

    I hope and pray that at least one of those little embies makes itself right at home and is in for the long haul.

    I would give you advice on how to keep your mind off of it the next two weeks, but I don't have any because I am total crap and not thinking about it during my on TWWs. lol

    I will be hoping and praying with you!

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  10. I am so excited for you!! It sounds like everything is turning out perfectly!!!

    I really don't Think there is a way to Way to get out of the 2WW with your sanity. But if you do find a way, you could write a book and make lots of money!!

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  11. Sounds like you made the best decision possible with the information you had. Hoping it pays off for you big time!

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  12. Glad you went with your gut....and on the bright side you always have plan B....

    Two week wait is the worst so just hold tight and we will all be here for support if you need it:)

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  13. So awesome, K! Officially PUPO and a little bit crazy like the rest of us fertility folks. ;-) Although, I have to say I feel a little more studious after receiving that fantastic science lesson. :-)

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  14. Sounds like a great plan! I am so excited you have three to freeze! We are PUPO together! I had my transfer yesterday...!!!

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  15. Congratulations on such great embryos! I'll be thinking of you and hoping that they stick!! :D

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  16. just linked this article on my facebook account. it’s a very interesting article for all.

    Freezers

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