"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy. "

03 August 2010

My Baby Knows

Yesterday I found out that a person I know is pregnant from her first IVF... and it stings. I was so down last night thinking about how frustrating this journey is, how random it seems to be. How while I have new directions to follow, I still don't know the best path to take.

But sometimes it doesn't even seem that random. Sometimes I feel like I'm always getting the shit end of the deal. I know.... I'm just feeling sorry for myself. But thats a really hard thing NOT to do in this situation.

So just when you feel like all hope is lost, you have a dream that gives you some strength back.

Dear Baby,

Thank you so much for coming to me last night in my dream. I think you know that I needed to see you and that holding you in my dream will give me strength to continue on this journey. I can still feel how it amazing it was to hold you last night and show you to the world.

I can't wait to meet you and hold you in this reality too.

Love, Mom


  1. You made me cry. Thank you for sharing your letter with us.

  2. What a beautiful letter...

  3. Thanks for the post on my blog. I am seriously thinking of changing doctors because I am sick of all this waiting and I feel like the doctor doesn't have any investment in my care. I wish I could call or email the doctor but they don't offer that service. I am starting to think the only reason he has ordered the HSG is to check to see if I can get any government coverage. Although I hate waiting, with the new school year starting in the next couple of weeks, staff meetings, and setting up my classroom I
    am hoping the wait doesn't seem as long.
    Thanks again and I think your letter is very powerful!