"Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy. "

04 April 2010

Dear Baby

I was going to share an old journal entry with you again but the few that I had paged through were pretty sad and it didn't fit my mood. So I thought instead that I would write a new letter to my baby today...

Dear Baby, 

I miss you. I'm sorry that I haven't been focusing on you as much in my everyday life lately. Work has been busy and I've been filling my spare time with studying. I've also been trying to get outside a lot. The weather is amazing right now. I love the transition to spring. I can't wait to show you the dog park in the spring, with all the new plants budding and blooming into color. You'll love it, I'm sure.

I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but its been somewhat nice to not focus on you as much lately because I sometimes feel like a whole person again, like someone who isn't missing a baby, but someone who is simply living her life in the moment.

But I still miss you, and I still want you to know that B and I are here with open arms and hearts waiting patiently (maybe not always patiently) until you come. And I don't want you to think that because I seem to be mostly happy (I'm trying, but some days its still hard) that I want you any less. In fact, I have never been more certain that I want you in my life and I can't wait till you arrive.

So, I just wanted to make sure that I got this message out there to you... we're here, ready and waiting for you. Please come soon :-) 

Love, Mom.

4 comments:

  1. I know your baby wants to say, "Don't worry, mama. I'm so glad that you're happy and enjoying springtime. I'll be there as soon as I can."

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  2. Oh Mags! You're awesome. You always have some of the greatest things to say. Thanks!

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  3. I just want to say that I can completely relate to you. We were about to start our first IVF cycle and I found out I have an autoimmune disorder (which isn't even the reason we weren't getting PG---it had been MF the whole time.)

    It is so hard and I am torn now between adopting and just not having kids and I am so sad.

    Wish you all the best!

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  4. Kathleen, your letter brought tears to my eyes! As someone who has very little patience, I hope and pray that your baby comes into your life very soon!

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